Blinking Red 20

Hi, my name's Holly, and I'm addicted to XM Radio.
I seriously LOVE it!  I am currently addicted to Oprah radio (channel 156, Ya'll!), and I listen to Gayle King's show, Dr. Oz, old Oprah reruns (or do-overs), Maya Angelou, Even Laura Berman (only if I'm alone!), and Lisa Kogan (she's only on when I'm almost never in the van).  So Good!  I've learned about trying to hug my boy, even if he doesn't want it, and today I learned about a woman who was learning to cook with Iraqi women, bonding with them during the war.  Current events, health, and family stuff-so far, worth the fee.  (Ask me again in 3 months when it renews!)
Ches may be on the up-swing.  He's out of the bed (thank the Lord), so there's promise.  He went back to the doctor today, and now they think since he broke out with some rashy spots, that it might be a tick-borne illness.  They hesitate to call it Lyme Disease, but they gave him some antibiotics, since testing for the two or three things it could be takes time, and it's easier to just medicate him to see if it helps.  He got some pain pills for the pain and inflamed joints also.
I hate to be negative.  But.  This illness has been really hard on me.  I've made him food, brought him a little lap desk, cleaned up food remains, cleaned the nightstand of Icky Stuff, changed the pillowcase, cleaned the bed of crumbs, straightened up the bed (if he's up for a bath), I'm taking care of the kids all alone, and I'm not getting any sleep since he's watching tv all day and night or shaking out some pills from his bottles or eating, and I'm so worn out! (although last night I took a Xanax and slept like a log, cause one of us had to get some relief!)
So, it occurred to me..I'm wondering if this is how hard it was when I was down and out four weeks ago.  It's tough!  And what goes around does come around..

Ok, I have a sticky situation, and you can advise me.  I have been lazy (honesty: come and get it here!) lately, and haven't listened to my answering machine in almost a month.  I do scroll the call list, but I've felt like I'm under no obligation, due to circumstances.  I've kinda given myself some room.  (and because some of them-maybe only 2-were Ethan telling us he loved us-too precious to delete!)  Well.  I finally listened to most of them on Saturday evening, and there was one from a good friend asking to play.  I have no idea when she called!  It could've been when we were out of town, maybe during the surgery time, maybe she didn't know.  I don't know!  But she asked to play, and said if I didn't want to play not to call back.  (!)  I feel awful!  I would never not call back, but now I haven't called back.  What a mess.  That blinky *20* on there is starting to get to me.  I gotta pull it together and get back in the game.  That Mommy Game of play with people and socialize and smile-maybe I drew the Go To Jail (Go Directly to Jail, Do Not Pass Go, Do Not Collect $200) card, and have just rolled for the third time. (and maybe I'm headed towards hotels..eek!)  So.  What would you do?
I'm off to bed (maybe early?), Woo Hoo!  I just LOVE my bed.  Well, I love it when it's clean and I get to actually sleep in it..